It must have felt that way again Sunday night. Yeah, the home team won. It was one of those good-teams-find-a-way-wins coaches talk about. It also turned millions of Couch Americans into remote-seeking missiles.

By halftime, WCPO-TV general manager Bill Fee had to be feeling a little under the weather. Fee was in charge of deciding to supplant the Emmys for this game.

Perhaps Fee figured the people who don't have cable TV and were unable to get ESPN deserved to see the Bengals, too. As a card-carrying member of cable-free nation, I can appreciate the gesture.

PHOTO GALLERY

Photos of Sunday's game

But man, what a stinker. It was like bumping "The Sopranos" for "I Married Dora."

The Bengals beat the Miami Dolphins - or at least what remained of the Miami Dolphins - 16-13. You could say the Bengals defense rallied from last week's bomb to deliver a message of hope. Or you could look at the Dolphins offense and weep for the future of football in Miami.

You had to feel a twinge in your heart for Miami quarterback A.J. Feeley. And in your knees and your sternum and your ribs and anywhere else the Bengals' front seven smashed the Dolphins quarterback. Feeley isn't Dan Marino. But when your "feature" running back is Lamar Gordon, someone the team picked up 10 days ago, and your offensive line believes blocking is a concept best practiced by others, well, you don't have much chance.

Not that the Bengals were a rolling ball of butcher knives. Until the game-winning drive, as precise as Carson Palmer was last week, he was that shaky Sunday night. On the game-winning march, Palmer completed seven of eight throws, moving the Bengals close enough for Shayne Graham's winning field goal.

How does a QB take a lesson in NFL lump-taking for 58 minutes, then deliver in the final two? "I dunno," Palmer said. "The game (was) on the line."

Nobody scored an offensive touchdown for 56 minutes. Miami's offense consisted of running Gordon into a big ol' pile of people at the line of scrimmage. The Bengals turned Brian Simmons loose. Simmons, aka The Secret Weapon, sprinted 50 yards with an interception in the third quarter.

That TD dash gave the Bengals a seemingly insurmountable 10-3 lead.

It also showed how much better the Bengals offense is when Simmons is playing outside linebacker.

To review: The Dolphins can't roll out of bed without losing another player. Their Pro Bowl cornerback, Patrick Surtain, was out with a groin injury, which has to be painful, but maybe not as painful as watching this game. Their best run-stuffer, tackle Tim Bowens, missed the evening with a bad back.

Miami's fullback was out. Its backup "feature" back, Travis Minor, was out. He was the guy who was supposed to replace the guy who quit football just before training camp, to see the world in 80 days, from the gondola of a hot-air balloon. Or something. If Ricky Williams watched this ballgame he had to be laughing loudly, between tokes of herbal contentment.

Miami's best deep receiving threat, David Boston, is out for the year. Barely five minutes into the game, another starting defensive lineman, Larry Chester, limped off with a bad knee. Pro Bowl defensive end Jason Taylor left in the third quarter with a foot problem.

Think how bad it would have been for the Bengals if they'd played a team instead of an "ER" episode.

Regardless, a win is a win. Or as Palmer put it, "Any win is great, whether you're Brett Favre or me."

Favre couldn't have done it much better than Palmer did in the last two minutes. Now about those other 58. ...

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E-mail pdaugherty@enquirer.com

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